Monday, April 22, 2019

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TESTOSTERONE ALERT!

Two papers appearing in Nature have confirmed that Tie Domi is a normal male, and the rest of us violence-avoiding poufters aren’t. In One study, A Portuguese-American experiment that permitted one group of male aquarium fish to watch other aquarium fish fighting, while a second group of the same kind of fish were barred from the fights. Then the scientists killed all the fish and discovered that the ones watching the fights had more testosterone in their tiny little bodies than the non-watchers. By repeating the killings under different conditions the scientists discovered that the elevated testosterone levels lasted as long as three hours in the dead watcher fish. It wasn’t clear from the report whether the scientists who killed the fish had elevated testosterone levels. In another experiment involving the notoriously nasty fig wasps, scientists discovered that while the males of the species are hanging around with girl wasps they are just as likely to kill and dismember their brothers as non-related males. This finding coincides with anecdotal evidence concerning human males hanging around girls in some 15,000 U.S. and Canadian high schools, and with what your mother warned you about. No experiments were conducted on Tie Domi, but you can tell he’s one of them by the look on his face, eh?

216 w., February 1, 2001

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Christina Varga

Christina Varga lives in Toronto, has surprisingly long hair. She designs newspapers, and occasionally runs them..

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